You're More Than In My Head
by nodumbbitch
Summary: Mal and Inara can only wonder what might've changed in their relationship if she wasn't leaving. During Objects in Space. Oneshot.


**You're More Than In My Head**

_"You are the one, you'll never be alone again. You're more than in my head, you're more."_  
-Shiny Toy Guns, "You Are the One"

_This is a realy quick one-shot that takes place in towards the end of "Objects in Space" (the scene with Mal and Inara outside the infirmary).  
DISCLAIMER: I own no part of Firefly/Serenity. At all._

Mal looked down at her lip. It was cut and swelling. He was filled with a sudden rush of hate for the man who had hurt her. He had already hated the man for coming aboard his ship and threatening the rest of his crew, but seeing just a measely cut on Inara's lip pushed him over the edge. He tried to calmly conceal his anger and hatred towards Early, but he could see it in her eyes that she could see it in his.

Inara looked up at him. She wasn't really listening to what he was saying. She was looking into his eyes and looking into his soul. She knew how seeing just a simple sratch on her bothered him so. She tried to seem cool and somewhat bitter - she tried carrying out the disposition that she had since she told him that she was leaving. She felt like she was just walzting around a stage in costume for all this. She felt so shadowed and sheltered and she just wanted to burst out screaming.

Mal saw that Inara was replying to whatever it was that he had said. He wasn't much paying attention. He was, however, certain that if Inara knew that, she would be pretty gorram angry. By now he couldn't help himself, and he brought his hand up to her lip.

Inara shivered and her heart beat twice as fast as Mal lightly grazed his thumb across her lip. Three times as fast. She had to move away, she had to do something. She couldn't just cling to him, like her body and mind and heart screamed for her to do. It was what she wanted to do. She wanted to feel his lips against hers, cut and all.

Mal's blood was rushing through his veins ten times faster than usual. It was like he was on some kind of drug. He wanted to bend down and close the space between them in those quick seconds, those singular moments that felt like years. He wanted to finally feel her, the way had been longing to for a year now.

Inara pushed up on the balls of her feet and pressed her soft, delicate lips against his. He caught her mouth with his and she felt the warmth of his moist lips against hers. She poked her tongue into his mouth and explored it. It tasted like sweet sin. She felt exhilerated.

Mal pulled Inara's body into his with a firm but gentle embrace, running his hands gently over the contours of her back. She had the warmest and softest feel to her. He was getting dizzier and dizzier by the moment. When she slowly ran her fingers through his hair and tangled them in, he pulled her even closer. This pent up passion was finding a way out, and I must say, it's doing a mighty fine job, he thought to himself.

Inara could feel Mal's heartbeat through his clothing. She could feel him struggling to pull away. She could feel herself struggling to pull away. But she did, as did he. Somehow, none of the crew in the infirmary noticed their brief moment of passion. She pressed her forehead to his, and it felt feverish and hot. She began to lead him up to her shuttle, and she put on a quick act, as though they were fighting as they passed by Jayne, Book, Kaylee, and River in the hold. Even River didn't look up, but Inara saw her smile.

Mal stepped over the threshold of Inara's shuttle and he couldn't help himself. Before she could turn away, he grabbed her wrist and passionately kissed her, exploring every nook and cranny of her mouth. She returned the kiss just as passionately, just as hopefully. As she unbuttoned his shirt and ran her long, beautiful fingers over toned flesh, Mal kissed her again, through a smile. This was like a dream. This was like a perfect dream.

Inara allowed Mal to take off her dress. She was a companion, but this ritual suddenly felt new to her. It was her first real time, her first real experience, she thought. She unbuttoned his pants and slowly helped him slide them off. She had seen him naked before, but she had never felt so alive about it. He slowly kissed her bare neck and shoulders and she was awake in every part of her body.

Mal looked into Inara's eyes as she pulled him over to the bed, their bodies intertwined. He was alive and kicking, and he was amazingly happy. They were wrapped together, for many moments that lasted for lifetimes. Her experience and his gentle roughness meshed together and Mal became intoxicated with her scent. Her skin was so smooth, her hair so silky. He knew that he would never be able to let go of her.

Inara flinched when his thumb brushed her lip, and she turned away. Had he felt it too? This was why she was leaving, it was too dangerous. They couldn't do this, they couldn't have this. She would loose ranking as a companion. Mal wouldn't much care, but what about everyone else on the ship? She said something harsh and looked over at Simon on the infirmary table.

Mal just looked at her indignantly. He was once again caught in the fantasy that Inara loved him the way he loved her, the way he felt for her. He turned heel and walked away, pretending not to care all that much. It ripped him up inside.

Inara just stood, looking helpless. This was why she was leaving.  
Wasn't it?


End file.
